Yesterday, the lovely Mrs. Lynch and I had
an opportunity to stop in to see the new bocce parents, Yolonda and Andrew
Ryzner, and their new bundle of joy Madison Leslie. The girl is just beautiful, and I must say, that surprises
me. I have to tell you, I was really expecting an ugly Andrew looking kid. But
fortunately Madison will not have to go through life looking like a splotchy
sun burnt albino like her dad does. Look, I’m not trying to imply that Andrew’s
not the father; I’m just implying that he doesn't look like he's the father, so, he’s probably not the father.
I have to share a rather frightening experience I had not long ago. I was up at the La Fiesta with a small group of people and we ran into a big cast of Team Hate members. I chatted it up with one of their sisterhood, Dawn Rossi, who was sucking down a margarita looking drink while continuously posting shit on Facebook and Instagram. At some point in time Dawn abruptly decided our conversation was over and she got up, left my table, and returned to her group of happily or soon to be happily divorced gal pals. After the entire group of ladies had departed, I realized that Dawn left the bar without her coat. So, being the kind fella that we all know me to be, I decided that I would get up first thing in the morning and swing by Dawn’s house and drop it off, and perhaps, just maybe, get a peek of her in a slinky little nightie.
Now we all know Dawn to be a very attractive woman at 7pm on Saturday night, after she has had all day to get herself dolled up. But I must tell you, at 7am on a Sunday morning, before she has had a chance to put her makeup on, Dawn isn’t likely to get a guys wood to twitch. In fact, I believe her mug would most definitely qualify as an immediate boner suppressant.
Dale Politi sent me an email asking why his team, Sonofa Bocce, who had a better won/loss record than any other team in their division, was in second place behind Long Balls who have fewer wins than Dale’s team. Now I’m sure Dale received the league rules, just like everybody else did. And had Dale read those rules he would have been intimately aware of how points are awarded and how placements are made. But apparently Dale chose not to read them, and instead, he decided he would prefer to waste my valuable time. Time, that I might point out, I could be using to blog about what a dickhead Dale is.
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Our new mom Yolonda above, said she wants eight
kids;
be careful Octolonda, that shit don’t go away on it’s own.
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I have to share a rather frightening experience I had not long ago. I was up at the La Fiesta with a small group of people and we ran into a big cast of Team Hate members. I chatted it up with one of their sisterhood, Dawn Rossi, who was sucking down a margarita looking drink while continuously posting shit on Facebook and Instagram. At some point in time Dawn abruptly decided our conversation was over and she got up, left my table, and returned to her group of happily or soon to be happily divorced gal pals. After the entire group of ladies had departed, I realized that Dawn left the bar without her coat. So, being the kind fella that we all know me to be, I decided that I would get up first thing in the morning and swing by Dawn’s house and drop it off, and perhaps, just maybe, get a peek of her in a slinky little nightie.
Now we all know Dawn to be a very attractive woman at 7pm on Saturday night, after she has had all day to get herself dolled up. But I must tell you, at 7am on a Sunday morning, before she has had a chance to put her makeup on, Dawn isn’t likely to get a guys wood to twitch. In fact, I believe her mug would most definitely qualify as an immediate boner suppressant.
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At 7pm (left) Dawn got my
eyes to pop out of my head.
At 7am (right) Dawn got me to wishing I could rip
my eyes out of my head.
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Dale Politi sent me an email asking why his team, Sonofa Bocce, who had a better won/loss record than any other team in their division, was in second place behind Long Balls who have fewer wins than Dale’s team. Now I’m sure Dale received the league rules, just like everybody else did. And had Dale read those rules he would have been intimately aware of how points are awarded and how placements are made. But apparently Dale chose not to read them, and instead, he decided he would prefer to waste my valuable time. Time, that I might point out, I could be using to blog about what a dickhead Dale is.
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Even the kids at the beach think
Dale is a dick.
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Random Photo Opportunity
I'm thinking about doing this more often. All it is, is a photo that I get to write a caption for. Sounds right up my alley.
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| When did Scott Mills grow a beard? |
See you next time
Marty Lynch
The Court Marshal
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